Thursday, June 6, 2013

A Time When I Felt Tired, Excited, Angry, Disappointed, Underprepared, Nervous, In Awe, and Grateful.....

Tired.....
Yesterday... I was more than tired, I was exhausted.  Monday and Tuesday, were the start of an all day volleyball camp at Colorado College. All day meaning 9 am to 5 pm.  Just the two days were exhausting.  Wednesday was the last day of the CC camp, but I also had another camp from 5:30 to 9:30.  Wednesday night, I was so tired, I fell right in bed and was out like a light.  This morning when I woke up, my body still hurt, and I am still pretty tired.  

Excited....
I was very excited last summer when we went to Florida. We had not been on a major vacation since 2008, and Florida was the farthest trip we have taken yet. While we were there, we went to Disney's Magic Kingdom, and Animal Kingdom.  We also visited Universal Studios and hung out in the pool.  In Florida it was miserably hot, but we still had a good time.

Angry....
I really don't like being angry because when I'm angry I usually cry.  I know that it sounds lame, but I'm like my mom.... I cry a lot.... It's my way of expressing myself when I cannot think of words.   I cry when I'm mad, frustrated, sad, even tired.  If I try to be mad at someone and stomp around, I usually just end up feeling idiotic, therefore I get embarrassed and start to cry.  There isn't really a preferable ending, so I just skip the stomping part.  I don't like to think about being angry either, because thinking about it reopens the "wound" and brings on more tears, so I'm not going to think about it.

Disappointed....
I was disappointed last summer, when the Waldo Canyon Fire started.  The day the fire started, we had plans to go to a Sky Sox game with our family friends, the Js.  After the game we were going to camp out in my backyard, but because of the smoke and ash in the air and my brother's asthma, we had to reschedule.

Underprepared.....
I felt underprepared at the beginning of the school year when it came time to take my first test in my algebra class.  I really don't remember if the night before, I felt that I had studied enough, but when my teacher passed out the test and everyone else started, I was completely confused.  I forgot all of the material and had no idea what to do.  Luckily, not all of the tests had the same results.

Nervous....
I was nervous this year when school volleyball tryouts started.  I play for a club team, and spend a ton of time playing, but I am always nervous when tryout time rolls around.  I am always afraid that I am going to get cut from the team.  In the end I made the school's best team, and we won the district tournament.

On the same note, I am always nervous before a volleyball game or tournament.  When I first started playing, I would actually shake.... Now I don't shake, but I still get nervous.

I've never really thought about all the times I am nervous, but now that I think about it I seem to be nervous a lot.  I was very nervous at the end of the year when I had to take my final in math, and give my speech on Buddhism for language arts.

In Awe....
I am always in awe of my sister Sparkle.  She is a gymnast.  She is fabulous at gymnastics, and I am amazed by the things she does.  She awes me with her strength, fearlessness, flexibility, and her awesome attitude.  I envy the way she organizes her gym, social, and academic lives.  I wish I was as organized as she is.

Grateful....
Last year, I had a "falling out" with a friend.... The whole thing opened my eyes to how great my family and other friends are.  It was a really hard time in my life, and there are times when I still struggle.   However, I always have someone to help me wether it be my mom, dad, sisters, or my friends, KK, and JJ.  I am truly grateful for all these people have done to help me.


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